4 tips to help you stay healthy as you age

“Are you sure you want to stop colouring your hair?” my friends asked. “It will make you look old.”

I started going grey early, and coloured my hair for about 20 years. I’d always said I’d colour my hair as long as it looked older than my face. But at 60, my face had pretty much caught up.

So, I took the plunge.

Today, I’m still happy with my decision. It was a bit wrenching to choose a grey-haired Facebook avatar. And I’m still a little surprised when I unexpectedly catch a glimpse of myself in a shop window. I do keep up an ever-so-slightly edgy haircut.  So maybe that helps.

Hair colour might sound like a trivial starting point to address the very real challenges of aging. But changes in appearance are a big part of the process. And how we deal with them – and everything else that comes with getting older – matters. We can’t control the fact of aging, but we can affect how well we age. Polish poet Stanislaw Jerzy Lec put it this way: “Youth is a gift of nature, but age is a work of art.”

Changes and fears associated with getting older fit roughly into three categories, which overlap considerably:

• Physical
• Emotional/mental/psychological
• Financial

Physical changes, like grey hair or arthritis or osteoporosis, can profoundly affect our emotional well-being. Healthcare costs due to serious physical issues can affect our finances. Our emotional state greatly influences our physical health. In addition, emotions can trump reason when it comes to spending – or not spending – money. And finally, financial worries can result in both emotional and physical issues.

The benefits of getting older

There are pros and cons around aging that fall into all these categories. Let’s start with the good news:

• Seniors’ discounts almost everywhere, including half-price commuter train fares, or even free transit in cities like Montreal.
• The freedom that comes from less concern about what other people think.
• The wisdom that comes from life experience.
• Grandchildren, and having enough time to enjoy them.
• Discovering that disasters like job losses, relationship failures and family deaths are actually survivable.

Less fear of the unknown, because less is unknown.

The drawbacks of getting older

Aging brings its own challenges. Some develop over many years; others can creep up on you virtually overnight.

• Wrinkles, age spots and various skin conditions.
• Reduced stamina and longer recovery time.
• Loss of purpose after retiring from your job and seeing your kids leave home.
• Losing family members – parents, aunts and uncles, and increasingly, friends and relatives your own age.
• Deteriorating vision and hearing.
• Increasing risk of arthritis, osteoporosis, hypertension, heart disease, dementia, diabetes and other diseases of aging.
• Financial worries: loss of employment income; lack of savings; increased healthcare costs. If you do have retirement savings, you might fear it will run out, or that inflation will cripple it.

But despite all these challenges, turns out older people are happier than younger folk. Psychological scientist Dr. Susan Charles is the co-author of a recent study on emotional well-being in adulthood. She observes:

“Contrary to negative stereotypes of aging, late life is a time of relatively stable and high levels of well-being... Older adults reported the highest level of well-being compared to all other age groups. They reported the lowest levels of distress (great sadness and anxiety) as well as the lowest level of reported negative emotions (feeling lonely, afraid and upset). They also reported the highest levels of positive emotions (being calm, enthusiastic and cheerful) than younger adults.”

There’s more evidence. The World Happiness report is a partnership of Gallup, the Oxford Wellbeing Research Centre and the United Nations. According to its 2024 edition, Canada ranks 15^th overall among the 143 countries studied. (Finland is first; the U.S. is 23^rd; Afghanistan is last.) The report also breaks down the results by age group. And Canadians over 60 far outrank those under 30, coming in at 8^th versus 58^th place, out of 143.

Aging gracefully – or aging well?

Is there even such a thing as “aging gracefully? Is this a a social construct to sell anti-wrinkle creams and potions?

What if we called it “aging well?” Aging well takes the focus away from looks and focuses on how we invest in ourselves, well into old age.

Sure, FOGO (fear of getting old) is powerful, despite our best efforts to embrace aging.

Our society has little use for older people. They (we!) are routinely trivialized, underestimated, ignored or even mistreated. Old age is something to be belittled, avoided and even feared. The cult of youth persists, although there are more old people in our country than ever before. It shows in how we speak of them – and how we speak of ourselves.

Tips for aging well

So, what can you do to increase your chances for a happier and healthier old age?

1. Speak positively about aging

How we speak about something greatly influences how we think about it. For example, how often have you said that you or someone else was having a “senior moment”? Told yourself to “act your age”? Or claimed, “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks”?

Clinical psychologist and gerontology specialist Regina Koepp, writing in Psychology Today, says phrases like these are very harmful. They discourage older adults from engaging in fulfilling activities and personal growth, she says. And they further unfounded negative beliefs and stereotypes.

2. Speak kindly to yourself for good health

That’s according to a study by the Yale School of Public Health and the National Institute on Aging. The study found that positive language about aging is associated with a lower risk of health issues like cardiovascular events.Take concrete steps every day towards physical and emotional health. Think of basic health advice like:

• Eating well.
• Staying active, physically and mentally.
• Knowing your limits. For example, take that 20K hike if you want to. But stop to rest more often than you would have done when you were 40.
• Getting enough sleep.
• Keeping an eye on your blood pressure, blood sugar and cholesterol numbers.
• Cultivating your social network and making and keeping friendships.

3. Prepare for financial changes

This includes:

• Making a savings plan for retirement, and sticking to it. And because life is full of twists and turns, make sure you update your plan when your circumstances change.
• Once you’ve retired, having a clear idea of how much income you actually have. Find out how much you have and how much you can afford to spend. That knowledge can take a world of worry off your shoulders.
• Getting your affairs in order can contribute to peace of mind. Draw up a will and power of attorney if you haven’t already.

So, whatever old age looks like for you, plan as best you can for it. Make healthy choices part of your daily life. And do more of what makes you feel good, even if you suspect you’re too old to do it.

Be happy – it’s your choice.